The Swap Agreement and the Skunk Ape

Monroe County made it’s third $1 million payment to the Key Largo Wastewater Treatment District.  As usual, it’s an occasion for distortion and spin.

I corrected Cammy Clark’s work below.  My revisions are in red.  Here’s a link to the original if you prefer unadulterated spin.


Skunk Ape presents check

100% genuine, not at all Photoshopped, picture of the Skunk Ape handing county check to KLWTD so the Odious Sylvia Murphy wouldn’t have to.  Thanks, Skunk Ape!

KEY LARGO – Monroe County Mayor Pro Tem Sylvia Murphy, on behalf of the Board of County Commissioners, presented the Key Largo Wastewater Treatment District on Tuesday with $1 million, the third installment in a 10-year Interlocal Agreement regarding the distribution of $17 million in Mayfield Grant Funds for wastewater projects in the Keys.  Just kidding!  The Odious Sylvia Murphy wouldn’t be caught dead handing over county money to her own constituents.  Bwahahaha.  I had ya there for a minute, didn’t I?  Don’t be so gullible, McFly!

The Odious One has worked hard every day for the last twelve years to make sure her constituents get the shaft.  Why the heck would she start treating them decently now?  It was actually the Skunk Ape handing over that check.  He graciously agreed to step up so the Odious Sylvia Murphy wouldn’t have to.  Such a gentleman.

Monroe County and the Key Largo Wastewater Treatment District entered into the Interlocal Agreement on May 20, 2015, to make the most efficient possible use of the Mayfield Grant Funds for the benefit of all residents of Monroe County, including those who reside within the Key Largo service area partially correct the enormous $125 million wastewater funding disparity that the county unfairly imposed on its taxpayers in Key Largo while the Odious Sylvia Murphy stood smugly by and smirked. The agreement will save taxpayers about $6.5 million in combined interest costs over the next decade.

“This just shows that two agencies can work together for the common good of our residents if the county’s repeated efforts to steal from our own taxpayers are stymied at every turn.  Also somebody has to watch us like a hawk and call us on it every time we lie and try to squirm out of our obligations.  At that point, we really have no choice but to cooperate.  The fairness!  It burns!  Help me…,” Murphy said the Skunk Ape on behalf of the Odious Sylvia Murphy. “This is a win-win for everybody, which really aggravates Sylvia’s guts.  Poor old Sylvia.  That’s not how this is supposed to go.  The crooked commissioners have expenses, you know.  Fines to pay.  Tax liens to clear.  Using taxpayer money for a beneficial public purpose is just sooo boring.”

Here’s how it works: Monroe County accepted KLWTD’s $17 million portion of the second $50 million allocation of the $200 million Mayfield Grant Fund – which by law the KLWTD CANnot use to repay debt for its already built system, but for reasons that remain super secret, the Scott administration and the legislature refused to allow it to be used for its intended purpose, which was to finance and refinance state-mandated wastewater projects in the Florida Keys. Monroe County used the funds to pay for construction on the Cudjoe Regional Wastewater System, a mismanaged resource suck which went $50 million over budget, pissed off virtually every customer in the service area, and spawned numerous lawsuits.  What a clusterfu__!  Lucky for Monroe County, Governor Scott apparently believes that taxpayer money is to be squandered and incompetence is to be rewarded.  And he wants to be Florida’s next senator.  Great!  Let’s go national with this crap.  Oh wait

It should also be noted that in the wake of the Cudjoe Regional fiasco, Governor Scott appointed Richard Toppino to the FKAA Board of Directors.  The FKAA, of course, is the county’s “partner” in many shady wastewater projects, including Cudjoe Regional.  Toppino’s family business has done approximately $12 million worth of work on the Cudjoe Regional project as a subcontractor.  This ongoing conflict of interest was covered up by the FKAA, Monroe County and the Key West Citizen.  When notified of the conflict, Governor Scott did exactly nothing.  I think it’s fair to say he’s okay with the whole mess, including the lying.

In return, Monroe County agreed to repay that $17 million to KLWTD at no interest over the next 10 years. This will allow KLWTD to receive its entitled share of the Mayfield Grant Fund, as well as repay its wastewater construction debt more quickly and thus save money on interest, which does absolutely bip for the ratepayers who will contribute roughly $2,000 more per household than other taxpayers in the unincorporated area.  The District Board needs to get off the stick, complete a rate study and figure out how to lower rates and assessments.  Monroe County also has saved money by using the grant funding to pay for construction at Cudjoe instead of borrowing and incurring interest charges.  Unfortunately, that barely makes a dent in the humongous overrun but we certainly won’t mention that in this fluffy decept-o-gram.

Okay ostriches, heads back in the sand.

End of press release.

I really should have applied for Cammy’s job.  I think I would’ve been really good at it, don’t you?

This entry was posted in BOCC, Bubba System, Key Largo Wastewater Treatment District, KLWTD, Monroe County, Wastewater. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to The Swap Agreement and the Skunk Ape

  1. What a tangled web those with power weave…legacys are being created..when you look at whos crimes are never investigated, you will see who the true rulers are…


    • M_Blank says:

      Yup. I don’t think Sylvia’s too worried about her legacy or what happens to her constituents. She’s focused on her own bottom line. Sad part is, I don’t think she gets much in return for selling us out.


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