Silent But Deadly Has a Challenger!

DavidRice_campaignposterI saw some excellent news in the corrupt local government propaganda rag, otherwise known as the Key West Citizen.  A candidate has filed to run against David Rice!

Of course, you can’t believe everything you read in the Citizen.  After all, they’re not really a newspaper.  They are a sleazy marketing operation and Monroe County is their biggest client.  They are so untrustworthy you have to verify everything they say – I mean everything.  Seriously.  Every…g__damn…thing.  If they told me grass is green, I’d go outside and check.

That being said, I went over to the Monroe County Supervisor of Elections website.  Sure enough David Rice has a challenger!  Vicki Tashjian.  I don’t know who she is.  She might be great.  She might be Satan.  Either way, she’s not David Rice!  That puts her way ahead in my book. Continue reading

Posted in BOCC, Bubba System, Elections | Leave a comment

Closing the Loop on the Animal Control Rip-off


This is what a shakedown looks like.

Monroe County has more or less conceded that there is no justification for the astronomical $175,000 price increase we’ve been forced to pay the Florida Keys Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (FKSPCA) to run the Marathon shelter.  After months of back-and-forth, including dragging the State Attorneys Office into it, the county finally admitted that they never bothered to collect documents that would have substantiated the true cost of running the shelter.

Unfortunately for them, at least some of that information can be found elsewhere, and it suggests that the cost of running the shelter is substantially less than what we’re paying FKSPCA.  The county never took basic steps to protect the taxpayers.  They set us up to be ripped off.  Why? Continue reading

Posted in Animal Shelter, BOCC, Bubba System, Monroe County | 1 Comment

Keynoter/Reporter Circling the Drain?

drain-2454608__480I saw this story in the Keynoter/Reporter misinformation rag.  Standard Keys skulduggery – newsworthy but not all that surprising.  Hell, our government officials do worse on a regular basis and nobody gives a damn.

Anyway, here was the most interesting bit for me.

He never performed the work and kept the money, said State Attorney’s Office spokesman Larry Kahn.

Larry Kahn?  Would this be the editor of the Keynoter?  Or former editor? Continue reading

Posted in Bubba System, Media, Monroe County | 2 Comments

Shady Bob’s Public Records Game

secrets and lies

Update2That little Brian Bradley fellow got back to me..  Turns out the county doesn’t have the audited financials from SUFA and SHARK.  That’s about what I expected.  Fortunately, I found other information sources, which tend to support the idea that we’re being lied to and ripped off while the State Attorney turns a blind eye.  The county did find FKSPCA’s 2016 statements but they are almost a year late.  I also got the reports from  I’ll be digging through those as time allows.

Update: is required by contract to submit monthly reports.  I requested those from the county for 2017.  I also repeated my request for the missing financial statements from the animal shelter operators. 

As you might recall, I first asked for those financial statements at the end of December 2017.  We’re closing in on the end of April now.  Remember when Chris Weber of the State Attorneys Office went to bat for the county claiming the missing records were a “timing” issue and the county was “working on it”?  That was in early February.  How much more mileage do you think they’ll try to get out of that excuse?  The whole animal control situation looks more suspicious all the time, and the State Attorneys Office sure seems anxious to keep a lid on it for their buddies at the county.  Nice to have friends in high places I guess.

End of update. 

I managed to loosen Shady Bob’s grip on public records related to Monroe County’s contract with is part of the Cooke Communications group, which also owns the Key West Citizen.  The Citizen tends to spin, if not outright bury, unflattering stories about the County and their cronies.  I wondered why they’re so blatant about it.  Perhaps this contract explains it.  It’s the money, honey! Continue reading

Posted in BOCC, Bubba System, Media, Monroe County, Public Records, State Attorney | Leave a comment

Keys Media Hellscape


Why can’t I find a decent newspaper in this burning turd pile?

The Blue Paper was the only news source in the Keys that did any sort of investigative reporting.  Its future is uncertain at this point, but hopefully it will live on in some form.  The Citizens of the Keys need a publication like the Blue Paper badly.  That was the one Keys news source which dug for the facts, found the documents and published well-researched stories you’ll find nowhere else. Continue reading

Posted in BOCC, Bubba System, Media, Monroe County | Leave a comment

The Swap Agreement and the Skunk Ape

Monroe County made it’s third $1 million payment to the Key Largo Wastewater Treatment District.  As usual, it’s an occasion for distortion and spin.

I corrected Cammy Clark’s work below.  My revisions are in red.  Here’s a link to the original if you prefer unadulterated spin.


Skunk Ape presents check

100% genuine, not at all Photoshopped, picture of the Skunk Ape handing county check to KLWTD so the Odious Sylvia Murphy wouldn’t have to.  Thanks, Skunk Ape!

KEY LARGO – Monroe County Mayor Pro Tem Sylvia Murphy, on behalf of the Board of County Commissioners, presented the Key Largo Wastewater Treatment District on Tuesday with $1 million, the third installment in a 10-year Interlocal Agreement regarding the distribution of $17 million in Mayfield Grant Funds for wastewater projects in the Keys.  Just kidding!  The Odious Sylvia Murphy wouldn’t be caught dead handing over county money to her own constituents.  Bwahahaha.  I had ya there for a minute, didn’t I?  Don’t be so gullible, McFly!
Continue reading

Posted in BOCC, Bubba System, Key Largo Wastewater Treatment District, KLWTD, Monroe County, Wastewater | 2 Comments

Too Crooked to Fail

directory-1187128_1280If you read the Real Poop regularly then you know I am very skeptical about our current county clerk, Kevin Madok.  I’m also very skeptical about the Key West Citizen.  That’s why I question the Citizen’s giddy delight over the latest “positive” audit at the Clerk’s office.

I have some very good reasons to be skeptical about Madok.  Here are just a few. Continue reading

Posted in Bubba System, Clerk of Court, Financial Condition, Media, Monroe County | Leave a comment

Shake up at the Citizen



The Keynoter/Reporter garbage-mess of a newspaper published a story about what’s happening at the Key West Citizen – another garbage-mess of a newspaper.

Interesting.  Very interesting.  Of course, I went the extra mile and turned up a bit more info. Continue reading

Posted in BOCC, Bubba System, Media, Monroe County | Leave a comment

Reporter Honors Self with Participation Award

participation award

Found it here.

Update:  I left out something very important.  The Reporter is supposed to be an Upper Keys newspaper, but they don’t come through on issues that effect the Upper Keys specifically.  The Reporter is so desperate to stay on the good side of the county commission, they failed to take seriously the unfair $100 million wastewater funding disparity that affects every household and every business in Key Largo. Same is true for emergency services, animal control, and probably every other issue you can think of besides.

The Reporter is congratulating themselves again.

Sigh.  So pathetic.  Like my mom used to say, “self praise is no praise”.

Here’s an especially amusing excerpt.

Reflecting on those early editions today, it seems like the editors back then may have been striving to be more like the National Enquirer than what The Reporter looks like today. We had a front page story in 1977, for example, about a Bigfoot-like creature known as the Skunk Ape visiting a Key Largo family’s home.

The fake Skunk Ape story was harmless entertainment.  Nobody was smeared or disparaged.  It was dumb, but it wasn’t mean-spirited.  Contrast that with some of the Reporter’s more recent work. Continue reading

Posted in Bubba System, Media, Monroe County | Leave a comment

A glimmer of sewer sanity?

light end of tunnel

Light at the end of the tunnel?

I just saw this fabulous story in the Free Press.  The Free Press belongs to the Key West Citizen family of newspapers, so let’s hope it’s not fake news.  Those guys lie like it’s their job.


After learning that the district will receive $3,333,333 in 2017-18 Stewardship Grant funds from the Florida Department of Environmental Protection, and that those funds could now be used to pay down debt, some commissioners weighed further reducing debt incurred from building Key Largo’s wastewater treatment infrastructure while others proposed reducing rates for property owners.

I’m glad the state is finally backing off their ridiculous, senseless, dumb-ass, crony-friendly, fraud/waste-encouraging, efficiency-punishing wastewater funding policies.  They must be enjoying the fresh air and sunshine after extracting their heads from their butt holes at long last.  Breath it in, guys.  See how nice that is.  Continue reading

Posted in Key Largo Wastewater Treatment District, State government, Wastewater | Leave a comment